Wednesday, June 25, 2008
If I Were an NHL Hopeful
Defenseman. Shoots right. Born: Pittsburgh, PA, December 29, 1977. Hometown: Birmingham, AL.
Heather does not own a pair of ice skates.
She is always chosen first in P.E.
Some concerns about her lack of competition considering P.E. usually consists of one other adult and seven 12 and 13-year-olds.
Amazingly average stickhandler but very sound positionally.
Should be an above average stay-at-home defenseman once she learns to skate backwards. Or sideways. Or at all.
Wears 18 in honor of Andy Van Slyke, who as far as she knows, has never played hockey.
Lousy slapshot but pretty decent wrist shot and backhand.
Her most memorable hockey moment is the day she roofed a shot short side from practically behind the net. It was pretty awesome.
If she could have dinner with any three people she would choose Andy Van Slyke, Bono, and Lindy Ruff. (Larry is really my favorite member of U2 but I think Bono would make for some really interesting conversation.)
She's not embarrassed about anything on her iPod. She will freely admit to Hanson, the New Kids on the Block, the Muppets, a couple High School Musical songs, and every Disney song known to man.
If she could be in any movie she'd be either Marion Ravenwood in Raiders of the Lost Ark or Han Solo in the Star Wars trilogy.
NHL TEAM: Buffalo Sabres
NHL PLAYER: Henrik Tallinder
SHOOTOUT MOVE: forehand to backhand, top shelf
PRACTICE DRILL: that one where you have to stay on your feet for more than 10 seconds
VIDEO GAME: Paper Mario, N64
MOVIE: Singin' in the Rain, The Great Escape
TV SHOW: Lost
ACTOR: Cary Grant
WEBSITE: Celebrity Baby Blog
BOOK: The Count of Monte Cristo
PUMP-UP SONG: Jump Around, House of Pain
FOOD TO COOK: haystacks (I've never used marshmallows though... intriguing)
ACTIVITY AWAY FROM THE RINK: reading, writing
TOY GROWING UP: Big Wheel (I never had one but my best friend Joel had a couple. We used to ride ridiculous circuits that make me wonder in retrospect how we managed to make it to 12 without getting hit by a car.)
PLACE TO SHOP: Borders
PLACE TO VISIT: Pittsburgh, PA
Now let's hope any GMs who stumble across this realize I'm just messing around. I mean, it's a pretty convincing profile, right? I'm sure offers would be pouring in if I don't make that disclaimer.