Heather and Mark Do Buffalo: The Bills Game

We went to the Bills game today. As the second half started I realized it was suddenly very cold, my jeans and gloves were completely soaked through by the drizzling rain, I hate drunk people especially when they're yelling "CALIFORNIA QUEERS!" and "SAN FRANCISCO FAGS!" over and over and over and over, even I could've done a better job coaching today and I know very little about football in general or the Bills specifically, the TV timeouts are aplenty and interminable, the 49ers are not that good at football, the Bills are evidently every bit as not good at football as the 49ers and football is not the same thing as hockey i.e. it's really slow and really boring.

Save me.

We've been home for five hours now and I still feel chilled right down to my bones. I currently have on two blankets, two comforters and two pairs of socks but it's not working. I'm pretty sure my teeth are chattering.

Only two things salvaged my day.

One, I finally got a chance to wear the kicking hat my mom made me for Christmas last year. Automatic favorite reader status to anyone not named Mark B. who can tell me what the inspiration for the hat is. Here's a better look:

"How's it sit? Pretty cunning, don'tcha think?"

And two, dinner at one of my favorite Buffalo eateries:

Thank God for foot longs and fries.

So yeah. That's a big FAIL on the Bills game. Good thing this is a Sabres blog.

Outrage

What?! Hank is scratched AGAIN?! But we LOST! It didn't work! Scratching Hank didn't make it better! We still got zero points!

I had a wonderfully thoughtful and inspiring post planned for today but unfortunately for you, I'm too busy pouting to write it now. I was resigned to watching one Hank-less game in person this weekend. I was NOT planning on watching two.

I'm feeling (and looking) a little unhinged.

I Hate The System and Other Complaints

A number of bloggers have recently written about how much they hate The System. I am fine with The System. If The System wins hockey games - and clearly it does - I say sign The System to a long-term contract pronto. I am all about responsible defensive hockey. I like offense in the sense that it's hard to win without at least a little bit of it, but I'm perfectly happy to watch solid defense and it doesn't even have to preclude offense.

What I am tired of - and what I suspect most people are tired of - is The System being used as an excuse after every loss. "We didn't stick to the system. We need to stick to the system." This bothers me for two reasons. One, if sticking to The System works maybe you should all consider... sticking to the system. You know, EVERY GAME. Watching you play painfully disorganized hockey and then say, "Huh. Guess we should have stuck to The System," is tedious at best and homicide-inducing at worst. Two, blaming The System has turned into a very convenient way to avoid taking any personal responsibility. I guess technically when Jason Pominville says, "We didn't stick to The System," he is saying, "We didn't play very well," but just once I'd like him to just SAY, "We didn't play very well." When is the last time time someone not named Ryan Miller came right out and said, "I was garbage." It's been a while.

That brings me to Derek Roy. Many, many people love to hate Derek Roy and for totally understandable reasons. He's a whining, diving punk who has a smirk on his face 98% of the time. I, however, have never held any hate in my heart for Derek. I love him, I have always loved him, and I have never failed to defend him. Ask Kate or Pookie and Schnookie all of whom have had to listen to me pontificate about Derek Roy and how underneath all that little person swagger is a really, really good hockey player. As I've over and over and over, "Ah, I love that little bastard."

If I ran into Derek Roy on the street tomorrow I'd punch him in the nose. He is driving me INSANE. I don't know what has happened to my Roy-Z Tolerance but it's completely gone. Everything about him right now makes me feel homicidal. The tripping all over the ice in desperation to get a call is killing me. The lolly-gagging around the ice is killing me. The nonchalant, "I think I'm playing pretty good I'm just not scoring," is killing me. (An email to friends after that quote: I wanted to punch Roy-Z square in the nose when I read a quote from him this morning saying something along the lines of, "I think I've been playing well, I just haven't been scoring goals." Dude, you're blowing chunks out there. You're hurting hockey. You're making hockey cry in agony. Just fess up.) The stupid penalty in friggin' OVERTIME is killing me. The whining about the call afterwards and the hinting that the opposing player took a dive IS KILLING ME. Derek Roy is lucky I was in Pittsburgh when he was standing in the room whining about his stupid penalty because had I been in Buffalo I would have jumped in my car, driven to the arena, crashed the dressing room and put the heel of my snow boot through his front teeth. At this point, I would vote to deduct from his All-Star totals if I could. Derek Roy, for the love of all that is good and right in this here world, just say it: Tonight I sucked at hockey. My bad.

Look, I don't want guys who are playing poorly to be all dreary and suicidal. Watching Thomas Vanek give interview after interview last season in which he looked like he was going to leap from the top of HSBC Arena as soon as he was done wasn't really that much fun. I know part of being a successful athlete is staying on an even keel, not getting too high after the great games or too low after the bad games. The NHL season is a long one and players are going to have stretches where they struggle and they just have to push through. I have no doubt that the way Vanek was beating himself up last season was just sending him into a deeper spiral. But I also hate it when I feel like I care more about losses and struggles than the team does. It's annoying.

You know those Mac/PC commercials? (I love those commercials but for me they just don't accomplish what I think Apple intends. I find PC very sweet and lovable and Mac a little bit of a pompous douchebag. But I digress...) There's a spot out now where PC is carrying around a buzzer and every time someone says "Vista" he buzzes over it in an effort to get people to stop saying it. I'm about to beg the Sabres for press credentials just so I can stand in the corner of the dressing room on a stool and hit my buzzer every time someone says "System." And then on the way out I'm going to kick Derek Roy in the shin.

On a completely different note, I'm having a hard time deciding where our pregame meal should be tonight. I've narrowed the choices down to Founding Fathers, Gabriel's and Mother's. Any opinions?

Heather Rambles About Her Job and the Olympics - But Not At the Same Time

So this has been a tough summer. I love, love, love my new class but they are a handful to say the least. They're all very explosive - it comes hard and it comes fast - and they're all runners. I've becoming very familiar with the layout of our building and the best spots to corner someone. I think the adjustment has gone very well considering I've only been in the room for four and a half weeks but they definitely keep me on my toes.

I've taken a particular liking to one of the kids. He's probably the most challenging. He lived the first part of his nine-year-old life in a very violent, abusive situation and it shows because he blows very quickly and he gets very aggressive. Twice this summer we've had to pull the other kids out of the room while he completely trashed it - kicking over chairs, flipping desks, throwing papers and pencils around the room. When he lifted the teacher's computer monitor over his head we finally escorted him out (whether it should have gone that far first is up for debate) and let me tell you, putting your hands on a kid who's already flipping out? Not that enjoyable. He's got a good heart - as most of them do - and he's really funny but he's a tough-talking little guy who already has way more walls up than any kid should.

But today kiddo had a great day. There was a point when it became clear he was starting to escalate - the body languate, the face, the pacing - and when I asked him if he wanted to go for a walk and take a break from what he was doing, he actually agreed which is a very big deal for him. He took my hand and we took a little stroll around the building so he could have a few minutes to chill out which he did pretty quickly. Right before we went back in the room I stopped him, put an arm around him and pulled him toward me and said, "Hey, bud, I'm really proud of you for taking a break before you got too upset. That was exactly the right way to handle things," and then I gave him a soft little head-butt on the side of his head - he's tall so his head is not too much lower than mine when we're standing side-by-side. He pulled back and said, totally shocked, "Did you just kiss me?!" I said, "No, I head-butted you, you goof." And he said, "Oh, okay..." and then added, a little more softly, "But you can if you want to." These kids, I'm telling you, they break my heart in good and bad ways all at once.

And now back to your regularly scheduled sporting news...

For a few months now people have been telling me how we're really lucky that part of this hockey off-season is going to be filled by the wonder and spectacle of the Olympics. Too bad I hate the wonder and spectacle of the Olympics.

I hate the pomp and circumstance of the Opening Ceremonies. It's fifteen hours of people walking around in stupid outfits. I hate the commercialism of things like the USA's official candy bar and the USA's official fast food sponsor. Please. Most of these Olympians have probably never sniffed a Snickers bar or a bag of McDonald's fries. I hate watching people run in circles around a track that leads nowhere. I hate listening to people go on and on about the beautiful swimmers in their stupid little suits. I hate watching puberty starved little girls flip around on mats and experience the peak of their careers at 14. I hate being told to care about sports where the winner is based on the subjective opinion of a judge. If I can't watch an event and know who the winner is, I don't care. I hate teams consisting of professional athletes who couldn't give a rat's ass about playing for their country pretend like they do.* I hate softball being tossed out of the Olympics with baseball for no good reason at all. I hate weeks of endless stories everywhere about something I'm not that interested in. It's impossible for me to avoid the Olympics because they'll be all over every single channel for the next forever and a day. I hate the manufactured drama of the Olympics. I hate that the networks decide weeks ahead of time who the stories are going to be. I do love when it doesn't quite work out the way everyone planned - see Dan and Dave, 1992. I hate the blown-up pageantry when it's usually a small moment that everyone remembers later. Dan and Dave were a bust in 1992 but who doesn't remember Derek Redmond's father running out of the stands to help his injured son finish his race? That's the kind of moment you can't manufacture and I hate that the bombast threatens to overwhelm things like that. I hate "inspirational" stories about kids who have grown up on the other side of the country from their families in order to pursue an Olympic dream. I don't care. Does that make me a bad person? I still don't care.

So in conclusion, I hate the Olympics.

You know what I do love a little bit though? Badminton. But that's it.

* - I'll exclude hockey players since I think playing on the national team is still a big deal for a lot of them.

I Hate Trade Deadline Day

Remember how I said yesterday that I wasn't going to talk about Brian Campbell again until after the trade deadline? Forget that ever happened, okay?

I need trade deadline day to be over and I need it to be over now. It's totally messing with my head! I first saw the Brian Campbell quote, "It’s not easy, and I can’t sit here and say I’m having fun with it. I wish it wasn’t me, to be honest with you," in the Buffalo News yesterday and I'll admit, when I read that I totally rolled my eyes and grumbled about him being a baby. Seriously, this is life as an in-demand free agent. If you don't want to be part of trade rumors, sign a contract. If you're intent on holding out for more money, then deal with it and all the ramifications like an adult.

But then I actually saw the interview on the local news and you guys... it made me so sad. It partly made me sad because to me it seems so obvious that if he's really that unhappy about the prospect of being traded or leaving Buffalo, there's a simple solution - sacrifice some of the money you want for the opportunity to stay in an organization and city that you know you love with teammates who you're already attached to. You're still going to be pretty fairly paid and you're still going to be extremely wealthy. Seriously, I do not understand why more athletes aren't more willing to do this. I can't wrap my brain around it.

But it also made me sad because I like Brian Campbell. I know I've mentioned this in passing in a couple of posts about him but I also know it was a half-hearted throwaway at best, something to temper the angry rantings about his contract demands. But watching him, lip all trembly, looking down at the ground, I remembered that yes, I really, really do like him. I don't like everything about how he's handled this season but when I first started watching hockey, he was one of the guys I attached to the quickest and it was because he was totally a heart-on-his-sleeve kind of guy. I loved that you could tell exactly how he was feeling - happy, excited, bummed, frustrated. As recently as the beginning of this season I listed him as my third favorite Sabre. Third! This year I was annoyed when he made the All-Star team because I knew certain people were never going to quit crowing about how that made him the awesomemest but last year? I was freaking thrilled for him. I sat at my computer and voted for him over and over and over during entire movies or TV shows. I loved how openly tickled he was to be there and how genuinely humbled he seemed that fans (and his mom) had voted him in.

Listen, I still don't think he's worth a penny over 5.5 million a year - and honestly I think that's a bit of an overpayment - and I have no desire to see the Sabres sink that kind of money into him long-term. I don't like a lot of things about how he's handled this season and I think he's lost some of his fun, happy shininess, but I did realize that if and when Brian Campbell leaves Buffalo... I'll be sad. He's been a Sabre as long as I've been a Sabres fan and I'll be really sad to see him in another jersey.

So I was already dealing with that this morning when Mark emailed me a rumor he'd read about the Sabres wanting to shake up the defense by trading Campbell, Dmitri Kalinin, and Henrik Tallinder. I made a list of all the reasons this rumor is ridiculous:

1. It was posted on a message board by a guy who claims to have sources in Tampa. Could he be for real? Sure. Could he be full of it? Absolutely.

2. Henrik Tallinder is currently the best defensive d-man on the team and one of the best bargains. He has an extremely reasonable contract with two years left on it. For an organization that is often caught up in the financial aspect of things, his contract is a gem.

3. Hank, Tri, and Soupy are all former Sabres draft picks and Darcy has often shown some attachment to players he drafted and raised. Is he really going to trade all the homegrown talent and keep all the guys who came in from somewhere else?

4. Rarely have I heard rumors about a Sabres trade that then actually takes place. Darcy Regier holds his cards close to his chest. Paul Hamilton was saying this on WGR yesterday and even went as far as to say that if a deal gets out, Darcy will pull back on it because he doesn't want any rumors out about it.

So as you can see, there are many, many reasons to completely ignore this rumor. I mean, it's totally ridiculous, right? Right? It is, right?

Geez, being a fan is so hard sometimes.

I Hate the Sabres, Part 3

I hate the Sabres.

I hate all of them but here are the specifics:

I hate Thomas Vanek for signing a ridiculous contract that he was clearly mentally and emotionally not ready to handle.

I hate Derek Roy for busting ass one night and looking totally disinterested the next.

I hate Ryan Miller for not being great when his team really needs him to be.

I hate Brian Campbell for spinoramo-ing right in front of his net, convincing Buffalo that he's insanely valuable, drifting toward the shooter instead of cutting off the pass, backing into his goalie, and making every thought about his contract negotiations public.

I hate Tim Connolly for dipsy-doodling until he's out of room to shoot or pass, insisting that yes, he can stickhandle through an entire team, refusing to wear a visor, actually saying aloud that sometimes visors make injuries worse, and spending as much time in bars as he does on IR. Which is a lot in case you're not paying attention.

I hate Andrew Peters for taking up room on the roster, repeatedly taking stupid penalties, and circling round and round instead of just throwing a friggin' punch already.

I hate Toni Lydman and Henrik Tallinder for being so inconsistent that people actually started talking about Soupy and Spacek being the number one defensive pairing. (I don't really hate either of these guys.)

I also don't hate Jochen Hecht, Paul Gaustad, Adam Mair, Nolan Pratt, or Daniel Paille.

I do hate Jaroslav Spacek but only for getting hurt. Otherwise we're cool.

I do kind of sort of hate Jason Pominiville for whiffing on every single one-timer in the last year. (That seems harsh. Maybe strongly dislike?)

I hate Ales Kotalik for being so inconsistent that it makes my head spin and for continuing to shoot slapshot after slapshot after slapshot even though the defender has caught on and is standing RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM.

I hate Darcy Regier for calling stupid press conferences that don't do anything but stir crap up. Good grief, don't pander to the crazies, Darcy. You really should know better. I'm gonna go ahead and hate Darcy in advance for not trading Soupy before the deadline.

I hate Larry Quinn for being a jackass. I also hate him for seeming to enjoy being a jackass. Geez, what a jackass!

I hate Lindy Ruff for starting the season off in a negative manner, benching Daniel Paille that one time, repeatedly scratching Nolan Pratt, continuing to foist Andrew Peters on the good people of Buffalo, and going all soft and cuddly on a team that clearly needs a boot shoved up its collective ass. They're not babies, Lindy.

I hate the Sabres for consistently playing hard for 20 minutes or less even though you and I have both noticed that IT DOESN'T WORK! I also hate them for pointing out after EVERY SINGLE GAME that they only skated for the last half of the game, saying all the right things about changing that, and then... NOT CHANGING THAT!

I hate the Sabres for all of the following statements: The effort was there, We didn't get the bounces, and Most nights if we play like that, we have a chance to win. Shut up! You sucked! We just watched the game and you sucked! JUST SAY YOU SUCKED!

I hate the Sabres for completely wasting the talent they have. You didn't score 10 goals by accident, guys. You are perfectly capable of playing hockey.

I hate the Sabres for proving all the naysayers right. Everyone said you'd be nothing without Chris and Danny and I can't believe you're proving them right. That is so disappointing. Maybe the most disappointing.

I hate the Sabres for the fact that I'm going to have to spend all summer listening to Bucky Gleason crow about being right. That is not a world I want to live in. The chance of that happening should be enough by itself to make you play hard. Geez louise.

I don't hate Mark at all, but I am kind of wishing he'd grown up in Detroit or Ottawa.

In closing, I hate the Sabres.

Why I Love Hockey Part 8: Because Most People Don't

Why I Love Hockey #8 - Because Most People Don't
That's right, I may go on and on about how I wish everyone loved hockey and how I wish you could find, watch, and play hockey all over the U.S. but I don't mean it. I don't mean any of it. One of my very favorite things about hockey is the beat-down, underdog feeling about the sport. I love that most people look right over it. I love that even sportswriters try to pretend like they're totally above watching it. I love that those of us who have discovered hockey hold a tiny, unappreciated gem in our hands. I love that when you meet a hockey fan you automatically know that person can't be all bad. I love that there are stretches of the country where hockey is practically a foreign word but little pockets of the country where people live, eat, and breathe it. If I'd stayed in Birmingham, I know there's a very good chance that I'd still be living a non-hockey existence and knowing what I know now, that would be a pretty big bummer. But I love the contrast between Birmingham and Buffalo where there's a buzz in the air on game day, there's a pall over the city after a loss, there are kids in the streets with nets and sticks and oversized jerseys, people waving at fellow fans and honking and yelling, "Let's go Buff-a-lo!" It's something that makes Buffalo special and that wouldn't be the case if love of hockey was a universal thing. I love that being a hockey fan feels like being in on one of the biggest, bestest secrets in the world and for all the complaints about Versus and ESPN and people talking hockey down, I know if everyone loved it, I'd love it a little bit less.

Something About Me #7 and #8
I forgot this on the last post so today you get two exciting facts about me! Don't worry, I'll keep them short.

I'm a huge U2 fan. I love them. I adore them. I want to hang out with them and talk to them all day. I love that the band has always consisted of the same four guys. I love that they seem like they really like playing together. I love that they seem smart and interesting in addition to being really talented. I love the way they mix the secular with the sacred. Usually I say Edge is my favorite, but I have a soft spot for Larry. I'm going to stop here because seriously, I could talk about U2 for a very long time.

I hate cell phones. I don't own one, I don't ever plan on owning one. I barely answer our home phone and when I do, I end the conversation as quickly as possible. I'm just not a phone person. If I have to call someone and it's a call I can make without actually talking to anyone, I'll purposely call when I think no one will be home and leave a message on the machine. Mostly I hate how rude people are with their phones. If you ever find yourself in line to buy groceries from me, please for the love of all that is good and right in this world, hang up your phone. And if you don't - if all you can be bothered to do is grunt at me while you carry on your oh so important call about the new shoes you just bought - don't you dare complain to me about anything later. I'm not the one who wasn't paying attention.

Chris Neil Sucks

Here's what Chris Neil had to say about Brian Burke's assertion that he should've been suspended as well:

"He just pointed me out because I was the last person he saw leaving the building (laughs)....I am not him (Pronger)...He stabs guys in the back after the whistle with his stick...takes guys legs out..everyone knows that's how he plays. He been suspended for games multiple times, I haven't. You figure it out."

I wish I could figure it out, Chris but for some reason the NHL is content to let you play the way you play. When you finally hurt someone, I hope they feel embarrassed for all the times they let you get away with leaving your feet, making contact with someone's head, or hitting people who can't see you (and not because they're not paying attention). Considering who's in charge however, I doubt that will happen.

I left Chris Neil off the anti-Ottawa post because I didn't think he was really worth getting that worked up about. But I've changed my mind. I hate watching him play and no, I wouldn't feel differently if he was on my team.

All right, I'm moving on, I swear...

Game Three Thoughts

I finally get to watch an entire finals game! Woo-hoo!

- How the heck does Scott Niedermayer get a penalty for lifting a guy's stick (a.k.a. playing defense) when Chris Neil gets away with leaving his feet on every single hit? New NHL, my ass.

- Can we please, please, please do away with the kicking motion rule? When no one - players, refs, analysts, fans - can predict which way a goal review is going to go, it's time to re-think things. The NHL has been so inconsistent with this rule during the postseason that it's ridiculous. You could play 10 goals that were reviewed one after the other and have no idea which way the call is going to go. I'm convinced Toronto just flips a coin on these. I think the rule is stupid to begin with - if a guy is skilled enough to direct a puck into the net with his skate, I say good for him - but if Alfredsson's goal wasn't a kicking motion, I don't know what is. He reached back with his foot and flipped his ankle toward the net. I'm not convinced the league didn't have an eye on the scoreboard and the series when they made the decision to allow that goal. Gah! I hope Sidney Crosby is there somewhere flipping out and throwing things because this goal was deemed good and his goal earlier in the playoffs wasn't.

- In regards to the Alfredsson goal, Brett Hull is tearing into the NHL for not getting it right during the Stanley Cup Finals. Isn't it ironic, don't you think?

- I’m sorry, the Senators stood up for each other during the Buffalo game? The Buffalo game where Chris Neil completely blindsided Chris Drury who, through no fault of his own, doesn’t have eyes in the back of his head? The Buffalo game where they all turtled and cried that the big mean Sabres came after them? The Buffalo game where everyone in an Ottawa jersey watched an enforcer fight their goalie? That game? Interesting interpretation, that one.

- All right, the Pronger hit to McAmmaond's head was ugly. But is it really that different than Chris Neil leaving his feet on every hit and connecting with people's heads? I really don't understand how some serious hits this season have been completely brushed aside and now suddenly the talking heads are all going on and on about Pronger possibly being suspended. Again, the inconsistency in the NHL is ridiculous.

- I hate Pierre McGuire. I don't need him to tell me that the Ottawa bench is upset by the no-call on Pronger. I don't need him to tell me that the Anaheim bench is encouraged by a successful penalty kill. I'm not an idiot. I don't need him to point out that Spezza is now wearing an Eaves jersey. There are two guys in the booth who can probably handle that. Go away, Pierre.

- Turns out I'm cheering for the Ducks. I was a little taken aback at just how much I wanted them to pull out the victory.

There's Always Next Year

Buffalo fans seem to be split into two camps right now. The first camp feels like the loss in the Eastern Conference Finals ruins the entire season. What's the point in playing so well all season if you're just going to choke when it counts? The second camp feels like, regardless of what happened in the playoffs, it was a great season, one that fans in Buffalo will remember for a very long time. I've bounced back and forth a little bit, but I've landed somewhere in the middle.

I'm definitely disappointed. I'm not disappointed so much in the fact that the Sabres lost - only one team out of 30 can win the Stanley Cup, the NHL playoffs are definitely the most grueling playoffs in pro sports, and we lost to a very talented, very motivated Ottawa team. I am disappointed that after having such a good season - a season full of heart and drive - the team looked so out of sync. I won't go as far as saying they didn't want to win because I doubt that's the case. The players certainly looked and sounded sad and disappointed about the way the season ended. But most nights, through all three rounds they played, they certainly didn't look like they wanted to win and they didn't appear to be concerned or angry about their play. By the time they snapped out of it, they were in a 3-0 hole to a very good team and there was no room for error. Maybe a Sabres team firing on all cylinders still loses the series to the Senators. I'm certainly not going to take anything away from the Sens. They're loaded with talented, they played like they wanted to win, they had each others backs on the ice. They were nothing short of fantastic. But even as crappy as we played (seriously, has there ever been a game more painful than game 3 of that series?) 3 of the 4 losses were one goal games and the first game wasn't as uneven as the final score suggests. If our powerplay is average (as opposed to unbearably craptacular), it's potentially a different series. Last year, when the Sabres lost to the Hurricanes, there was no doubt in anyone's mind that they left absolutely everything they had in them on the ice. This season, while the last couple of games were very good, most fans were left wondering where their team had disappeared to.

But it was a great season and not just on the ice. As Kevin has already said very well over on Bfloblog.com, no real Sabres fan can honestly say he came away from this season empty-handed. It's been said over and over, and I really don't know how to say it in a way that will make people outside of Buffalo understand or appreciate it, but the Sabres have become such a huge community thing over the past couple of seasons that it's mind-boggling. You could walk through any part of town and feel a buzz in the air on game days. Everyone walked a little lighter after a victory, everyone was a touch subdued after a loss. During the playoffs, thousands of people stood outside the arena and watched the game on a big screen TV because they wanted to be a part of things, they wanted to feel the incredible energy and community. For crying out loud, 10,000 people sat in HSBC Arena to watch a game that was going on in Ottawa! Ten thousand! The Sabres were the hot topic of conversation. I'm amazed at all the people I had hockey talk with over the course of the season - fellow passengers on the bus, the anti-social bus driver (the only time we ever spoke to each other), cashiers in stores, customers at the second job, and most amazingly to me, my students.

I've worked with 6th graders for 5 years now, and I've never, ever talked hockey with any of them. It just wasn't on their radar. We'd talk about football and basketball some (as much as I could since I'm a casual fan of football at best and not the slightest bit interested in basketball). We'd occasioanlly even get baseball in there though most of them were barely interested. Never talked about hockey though, not until this year. The interest was helped along by the previously mentioned Dylan, an awesome little hockey player himself and a real fan of the game. The two of us would sit down at breakfast every morning and talk about the previous night's game, upcoming opponents and amazing (or amazingly terrible) plays and eventually the other kids started to get sucked in. (If you're wondering why I eat with the kids every morning and why it sounds like there are so few of them it's because I work at a program for emotionally disturbed kids - highly supervised, very good staff to student ratio.) Most of them didn't turn into experts but they all knew whether the Sabres had won or lost, they'd all seen highlights on the news (some of them don't have cable so watching the games were out), and they all had favorite players - Danny Briere is very big with the sixth grade crowd - enter joke here about how it's because he looks like he could fit right in with them. The Sabres were a great talking point and a real bonding ritual with a bunch of kids that have been through hell in their short lives and are often reluctant to give any adult around them any part of themselves and boy, this is starting to sound extremely cheesy, but I'll always be grateful for that. And you know what's even better? The Monday morning after the team was eliminated the kids still wanted to talk about the Sabres at breakfast. What was it like to be at the game? Is Danny going to stay? Were there a lot of people outside? Is Danny going to stay? Did you cry when they lost? Ryan Miller is the best goalie in the world and I can't believe that loser Emery gets to play in the Finals! (They might've had some... uh, adult influence on that one...) Do you think we're still going to be really good next season? And hey, Heather, IS DANNY GOING TO STAY?!

So while I'm sure there are plenty of bandwagon fans who have spent the past week ripping the flags off their cars, tossing out their player posters, and listing their commemorative medallions on ebay, I know this current Sabres team has grown a lot of new fans who will stick with the team and the sport and that can only be a good thing, you know?

I told my kids during the first round that if the Sabres won the Stanley Cup, I was going to get a tattoo in celebration. A few days after the team's elimination, one of them asked me if I was still going to go through with the tattoo. "I don't know," I said, "the deal was they had to win it all which they didn't do." He thought about that for a long second and finally said, "I think you should get it anyway." "Yeah?" "Yeah. I mean, it's not like you don't still love the team, right?"

Right. Out of the mouth of babes and all.

Go Sabres!

Did I Say I Liked Ottawa?

FIVE REASONS WHY I, HEATHER BERMINGHAM OF BUFFALO, NY, WILL NEVER CHEER FOR THE OTTAWA SENATORS IN THE STANLEY CUP FINALS

1. I cannot stand Bryan Murray. I can't look at him. I can't listen to him. I have no logical explanation, I just don't like the guy. I get a knot in my stomach thinking about him having a Stanley Cup before Lindy Ruff.

2. I cannot stand Ray Emery. I can't look at him. I can't listen to him. I cannot read or listen to one more report about what a good goalie he is now. Because he isn't. He isn't a good goalie. He's a totally average goalie who would look ridiculous some nights if he played on a team with a defense that isn't as strong as Ottawa's.

3. I hate it when teams win a series on the visitor's ice. I was torn between wanting to hang around and salute my team after the handshakes and wanting to run so I wouldn't have to watch the carpet and tables being rolled out. Ottawa, the least you could've done was win in your own barn. You bastards!

4. Buffalo fans need company in the world of Repeatedly Watching Your Team Get Near a Championship and Then Having it Slip Through Its Fingers. Why should Ottawa win a championship before us? It's not fair!

5. I cannot stand Ray Emery. I can't look at him. I can't listen to him. Ryan Miller should be playing in the Stanley Cup Finals, dammit!

We'll have to wait until the Finals actually begin to see which post I meant more - the pro-Ottawa or the anti-Ottawa.

Bah!

(More coherent, less vitriol thoughts later.)

Suck It, Alfie

I was feeling a little more generous toward Daniel Alfredsson today until I saw that Hank is still feeling pretty sore and might not play tomorrow night and that Alfredsson said the hit was fine and he felt like Hank was looking for a call. I'll be pretty happy to get Nathan Paetsch in on the powerplay, but losing Hank would be a terrible blow. I'd rather lose any other defensemen on the roster. And while I don't expect Alfredsson or any other player to stand up and say, "It was a stupid, unsafe hit and I'm sorry" - though it would be a nice change of pace - it really bothers me that he would question the integrity of a guy like Tallinder. He hit the boards pretty hard, he's broken the same bone in his arm twice on similar hits, and he has absolutely no reputation for embellishment or dramatics. He came back on the ice because it was overtime of the #$@!$% playoffs. Suck it, Alfie.

Hopefully Hank will be feeling okay tomorrow.

Paging the Buffalo Sabres...

That goal review was bull. Complete and utter bull. I don't see how there was any question about whether or not the puck went over the line. The game should've been tied and we should've seen some overtime hockey.

That said, I'm getting a little tired of saying, "We didn't even play that well and the Rangers still barely beat us" because you know what? All that really matters is that they beat us. Why are we only playing ten minutes a night? Why?! The Rangers are playing about as well as they can and barely beating us, yes. We are capable of playing much better, yes. But we have to actually do it! I didn't see most of the game tonight so I am basing this on what little I saw and what I've read from other people, but I really expected to see a totally different team tonight. I would love to say that the boys are going to come out firing Friday night, jacked up and pissed off about their lackluster performance in NYC, but looking at them tonight, they don't seem to care. They look totally indifferent. Where oh where is my team of young, passionate players, burned by getting so close last year and bound and determined to win it all this year? Because I'm really missing them.

I know the Shanahan goal was the result of some miscommunication between defensemen behind the net, but I think the defense has been very solid this series, especially Tallinder and Lydman. They've done a very good job of containing a dangerous offensive team with some huge help from Miller, of course. It's time for the offense to step the hell up. Throw some bodies around, fight for the puck, pay attention to what jersey the guy you're passing to is wearing, shoot the puck and for crying out loud DO IT FOR SIXTY MINUTES. Geez. I'm dying here.

Is It Over Yet?

I'll tell you what, this series hasn't even started yet and I'm already tired of the Rangers, the Rangers' coach, and the Rangers' fans. I'm feeling like I may need to avoid major message boards for the next week or so because fans on both sides seem to be in a lather already. Settle down, peeps. Let's atleast wait until the games start and we actually have good reason to hate each other, okay?

Got our order forms for tickets to rounds 3 and 4. In a word, ouch. The price for our 300 level seats jumps to $113 for round 3 and $153 for round 4. Add in the fact that we have to buy tickets to all 8 home games and that's a whopping $1064 - $2128 for the two of us. And this is in addition to what we already paid for the first two rounds. The price itself doesn't bother me. For a pro sport playoff ticket, I think that's a darn good price actually. I've been to regular season sporting events where I've paid that much or close to it. But I really don't understand why we have to buy tickets to all 8 games. I guess maybe orders are easier to process that way, but I don't know, shouldn't a ticket office be able to handle individual games? Isn't that what they do all year? It's not like they're not going to sell the games we don't buy.

The hubby and I talked about it for a long time. We had the money to pay for the first two rounds but the new charge would go on the credit card. I took a second job at the beginning of the year with the goal of paying off our credit card debt by the end of the year so it didn't seem like a very good idea to slap $2000 on there. For a while it looked like maturity and fiscal responsibility were going to win out but in the end frivolity and sports madness took over. We'll sell a game or two in each round to friends and family like we've done so far and that'll give us some of our money back. What the hell, you know? You gotta enjoy something once in a while.

In action for the first time tonight will be my shiny new, never been worn jersey:


That, my friends, is one bad-ass jersey. (My photography skills on the other hand? Horrible.)

Blah Blah Blah

Okay, well the Sabres and I had our day off... Now what? When can we start playing again? How long do we have to sit around? I've been watching some of the other series, but it's not the same, you know? Let's move on with Round Two! Forget these other slow pokes who haven't finished yet!

Random thoughts that are floating through my head as I watch the end of the Calgary-Detroit game (go, Flames, go!). I'm down with the flu so as you read, please remember that I'm currently full of various medications:

- The Rangers, eh? All right. They have some firepower but I'll take our depth. The series, like many, might come down to which goaltender plays better, Miller or Lundqvist. I do think it's hard to get a handle on the Rangers however because the Thrashers were just not there at all and got thoroughly outplayed and outcoached. I do think it'll be a tight series, but I say we pull it out in 6. This is totally off-the-cuff so maybe that'll change after I put some thought into it. Special note to Tim Connolly: Please tighten up your chinstrap and please, please, please keep your head up. (Sidenote: Ooooh, 4 minute penalty against Calgary in OT. That's not good.)

- Ottawa vs. NJ should be an interesting series. NJ is definitely going to play the Sens better defensively than the Pens did and it goes without saying that Brodeur is a totally different animal than Fleury. I think this is the round where we see if there really is a new mental toughness to the Sens since NJ is bound to put up more of a fight than Pittsburgh did. I'm going to have to noodle over this one for a few days before I make the final pick for my playoff pool.

- I've officially decided that I don't like Mike "Doc" Emerick. He was a little better during the NJ-Tampa Bay game today than he usually is, but most nights he doesn't even seem to be watching the play. He spends way too much time telling precious stories about players' childhoods and sharing oddball stats and anecdotes that really aren't that interesting. (Sidenote: Detroit had 17 SOG to Calgary's 5 in the first OT. Geez.) That would be okay I guess except that Emerick doesn't seem to have any ability to go with the flow. Once he starts a story, he's gonna finish it even if someone is currently onscreen taking the puck from end to end, making everyone on the ice look foolish in the process. It's like he's reading a script and he can't break away from it until he's read the whole thing which doesn't work well for a game that moves and changes as quickly as hockey does. Of course, I'm probably spoiled. Almost every hockey game I've ever watched has been announced by Rick Jeanneret who is a true play-by-play man. He may actually call TOO much action if that's possible - it's obvious he started on radio - but I'd rather a guy give me more detail than I need than appear to not be that interested in the game.

- I'm a little sad to see Tampa Bay go out for a couple of reasons. One, I've loved watching Vincent Lecavalier play this year. He seemed to play with an all new fire, atleast to my eyes, and even when he was scoring on my team it was really fun to see. Thanks for all the points you rang up for my playoff team before being eliminated, Vinny! Second, I would've really enjoyed seeing Tortorella and Ruff battle with each other. They're two of the most entertaining characters in the NHL. (Sidenote: Calgary, you'd probably have a better chance of winning if you'd get the puck away from your OWN GOALIE. Good grief!)

- I can't even put into words how tired I am of the Labatt Blue fish commerical. There are so many things that bother me about this ad.
- How does the fish get from the lake to the phone?
- How does the fish get the phone off the hook?
- How does the fish dial the numbers?
- Why does the fish call Steve at work and then act surprised that he's... at work?
- Why would a fish want more fishermen at the lake?
It's possible I'm overthinking this but seriously. Am I alone here?

- Brian Campbell's commericals for The Center For Excessive Sweating and Veins, Veins, Veins, on the other hand, are comedy gold. I give Soupy credit for injecting a little personality into his pitch (there's a Jason Pominville ad on the radio that features the most stilted, robotic reading ever - it's awesome in its awkwardness) but he totally comes across as a used car salesman. If you replaced the doctor's office background with a car lot and changed, "Your insurance WILL cover it!" to "We WILL finance you!" you'd never know you were looking at a hockey player. I smell a second career! (Sidenote: Detroit won AND Dom didn't seem to pull anything. The fans are chanting "Kipper!" as they darn well should be doing. There goes that pick.)

- If UPS tracking is accurate, I should have a shiny new jersey tomorrow! Yippee! (You'll have to come back later if you want to know what/whose jersey it is.)

Geez, I guess it was a good thing I was already planning on calling in sick tomorrow. It's really late.

One Down...

Fifteen to go.

Game analysis is not my strong point (I'll direct you to Sabre Rattling and Bleeding Blue and Gold for that), but I will make some very brief comments about tonight's game:

Things were pretty close for most of the game on the scoreboard, but I think Buffalo outplayed the Islanders overall. We had a lot of chances we weren't burying - it's just a matter of time before the Vanek-Roy-Afinogenov line explodes if they continue to buzz around the way they did tonight - and the Islanders got very few real scoring opportunities. Very little got through to Ryan and even then, he didn't have to make any spectacular saves. Just a very good defensive game all the way around, a couple of big turnovers aside. The Islanders hung in there for a while, but I think it was made pretty clear that they're simply overmatched in this series.

The special teams were very strong, thank goodness. The powerplay was 2 for 6 with a third goal coming seconds after an advantage ended. The penatly kill looked particularly good and at times it seemed we were getting as many scoring chances on Islanders' powerplays as they were.

Dubie played fine. He looked a little shaky at first but settled in well and kept the game from being a rout. I guess I can understand wanting to put your starter in once he's cleared, but how long has it been since DiPietro played? How rusty is he going to be and what are the chances of him getting roughed up and ending up with another concussion? Dubie isn't the reason the Islanders lost so I don't think it's necessarily smart to pull him. DP has 14 more years to play for the Islanders in the playoffs, you know? (Hee.)

And... that's all I got.

The mood before the game was a lot of fun. The crowd was crazy at the beginning of the game but tailed off some when the score stayed so close. Everyone was a little nervous, I think and stayed that way until Chris put us up 3-1. Things loosened up then although people started leaving not too long after that so they didn't even really get to enjoy it. I'll never understand leaving a game early, especially a playoff game. The only time I've ever left a game early was when I had to catch a bus home. And even then I only left because it was the last bus of the night and I didn't want to spend the night downtown.

The one real negative about the Sabres being so popular in Buffalo right now is that I really think there were a lot of people in the building who were just there because it was the cool, happening place to be. They weren't there because they love hockey or care about the team, they were there because everyone wanted to be there. The three people beside me had clearly never been to a hockey game and had no idea what was going on. And not in a "I'm a new fan and I'm still learning" way. That I can handle. Hey, I've been there. I knew very little about the workings of a hockey game when I moved to Buffalo (almost seven years ago) and I had to ask things like, "What's icing?", "What's the difference between a shot on goal and a scoring chance?" and "What's a trap and why do we hate it?" But these people barely paid attention to the game and spent most of the 60 minutes walking back and forth to refill their beers. (And my disgust is not even taking into consideration how many times the girl right beside me smacked me in the face with her pom-pom.) They could've spent the evening in a bar and let real fans have their seats. Last year a couple friends and I decided that anyone buying playoff tickets should have to pass a quiz about the basics of hockey and the specifics of the Sabres (yes, we were upset that we couldn't get tickets). Here's a short version of what we came up with (yes, we did waste a day's work time doing this):

1. WHO WEARS THE FOLLOWING JERSEY NUMBERS?
61, 23, 45, 30, 19

NAME THE TEAM CAPTAIN/ALTERNATE CAPTAINS.

WHO IS THE HEAD COACH?

DO THE FOLLOWING PLAYERS PLAY ON OFFENSE OR DEFENSE?
Jochen Hecht
Toni Lydman
Teppo Numminen
Ales Kotalik

WHO'S MISSING FROM THE OFFENSIVE LINE/DEFENSIVE PAIRING?
Henrik Tallinder and _______________
Jason Pominville, Daniel Briere, and ____________

BRIEFLY DEFINE THE FOLLOWING:
powerplay
penalty kill
icing
off-side

****BONUS POINTS FOR SEATS IN THE SECTION OF YOUR CHOICE*****
NAME ALL THREE MEMBERS OF THE FRENCH CONNECTION.
NAME FIVE OTHER FORMER BUFFALO SABRES.
WHAT COUNTRY ARE THE FOLLOWING PLAYERS FROM?
Maxim Afinogenov, Henrik Tallinder, Brian Campbell, Ryan Miller, Jaroslav Spacek*

I don't think this is asking too much.

In closing, one of the things I love most about Brian Campbell is how darn thrilled and excited he looks when he does something good. No calm, collected celebration for Soupy.

Getting to Know You, Getting to Know All About You

Since we have a few days off, I figured I'd take this opportunity to answer some questions about myself and my feelings about hockey and the Sabres so anyone who stumbles across this knows what they're dealing with.

Should the Sabres keep Daniel Briere or Chris Drury?
I'm so not having this discussion right now. We're still playing! We're heading into the playoffs! This team is awesome, totally capable of bringing Buffalo its first professional sports championship! I'm not interested in discussing the best way to break up the team right now. Can we please, please just enjoy le petit Briere AND Drury while we definitely have them both? Please?


No thoughts on the matter at all?
No!


Okay, fine. Who are your favorite Sabres?
I'm happy to say that there's no one on the team I really dislike. There are a few guys I'm a little indifferent to - I don't mind them being around, I wouldn't be heart-broken if they weren't - but there's no one player I wish was elsewhere. (But you're on probation, Mair.) That said, I do have my favorites. I'll spare you a breakdown of the entire team and give you my personal top 5. Please keep in mind that I'm not saying these guys are the most talented or the most valuable. They're just my favorites.

1. Henrik Tallinder - I simply adore Hank. He's so steady and so dependable. He never panics and almost always does exactly the right thing with the puck. He goes one-on-one with the league's best offensive players as well as anyone in the NHL. And in addition to that, he's just a beautiful skater. I could watch that long, lean frame move effortlessly up and down the ice all night.

2. Tim Connolly - Watching Tim Connolly blossom last season was one of the most fun things I've seen since becoming a hockey fan. I'm afraid some fans are going a little overboard with the "Timmy will fix everything about our special teams!" stuff, but I'll take what he can give us, that's for sure. I've missed watching him this year and hope he comes back with a vengeance.

3. Brian Campbell - I just like him, plain and simple. There doesn't really seem to be any divas on the team, but Soupy comes across as particularly good-humored and down to earth. He's another guy I love to watch skate even in warm-ups and he always looks like he's having fun out there. Almost every game there's atleast one shot of him with a huge "Holy crap I can't get believe I get PAID for this" grin on his face.

4. Derek Roy - Little D, as he's known in my house, isn't perfect. While I'm glad to see he's cut down on the diving, I could do without the whining after every non-call. He's also prone to taking bad penalties when frustrated. That said, the kid is a dynamo. He plays as hard as anyone on the ice and he's turned into a really solid 2-way player. I love watching him kill 20 seconds off a penalty all by himself and I really love watching him mix it up with guys twice his size. Some fans are disappointed with his offensive output, but he has centered the most consistent line all season, even when his wings changed. Gotta give him some credit for that.

5. Chris Drury - Heart and soul of the team, no doubt in my mind. I think his value to the team was perfectly demonstrated by the response to Chris Neil's hit on him a couple weeks ago. Chris does all the little things night in and night out. You might have to watch him regularly to really appreciate how much he means in a game, but trust me, he means a ton.

Wait a second. Chris Drury is on your list of favorite players and Daniel Briere isn't. So you'd keep Chris, right?
Again with this?

What do you think of the Sabres' new unis?
They're godawful ugly. They were ugly when they were introduced, they're ugly now. The fact that the Sabres have sold a bajillion dollars of merchandise with that logo on it doesn't make it any less ugly. When the logo first started showing up on merchandise I half joked that I was boycotting it, but I still haven't bought anything with it for myself and now I'm going to see how long I can hold out. I did buy my husband the new blue Drury jersey he wanted but the only things I've purchased for myself this season are a t-shirt with the vintage logo and a vintage 3rd Tallinder jersey. After getting an up-close view of my husband's jersey, I don't hate the colors although I do think the bright vintage blue is much more distinctive. Half the teams in pro sports wear some variation of navy blue now it seems. But I don't like the design and the logo... well, it is just not pretty. And to the idiot who tried to tell me that my lack of support for the logo means I'm not a true fan, hey, you can bite me.


Dmitri Kalinin sucks, doesn't he?
Honestly, I think 'Tri has been one of the most consistent d-men this season. He does have the occasional horrible turn-over but he's hardly alone there. And chances are good that if a puck deflected off of someone and into our own net, it probably went off 'Tri but what are you gonna do? It happens. He's mostly solid and he's definitely been the best thing about our power play lately. He does still seem to struggle with his confidence, something that isn't new, but maybe it has something to do with every single game resulting in a "Kalinin SUCKS" thread on Sabres' message boards. I admit, I've developed a bit of a maternal protectiveness toward him. Ignore the haters, 'Tri and keep plugging away.

What are some of your favorite things about being a Sabres fan?
- sitting in a sold out arena even on a Wednesday night
- 18,000 fans yelling, "Chris! DRUUUUUUUUURYYYYYYYYY!" along with the PA announcer
- getting to watch a team grow up and mature together
- cheering for a team whose ownership appears to really understand and appreciate its fanbase
- Rick Jeanneret and the way he can make a pretty dull game seem a little more exciting
- all the great calls Paul Gaustad's nickname of Goose has led to, namely, "The Goose is really honking now" and "If you're out and about, give a honk for the Goose!"
- seeing one of the best young goalies in the league develop
- looking at the team and organization now, realizing how close Buffalo came to losing the Sabres as recently as three years ago, and feeling overwhelming relief and amazement
- screaming "LET'S GO BUFF-A-LO!" It has a good flow and it even rhymes for crying out loud! Seriously, try it. It's fun.

I hate Sabres fans! They're obnoxious and they probably eat babies.
Some of us might but I assure you that most of us are normal, excited, enthusiastic fans. I know many of you have had very poor experiences with Sabres fans in your cities and buildings over the past year and a half but try not to paint us all with the same brush. Trust me, it bothers me to hear stories of obnoxious behavior as much as it bothers you. Probably more since I'm the one getting lumped in with these losers. My devotion is to my team first and foremost but I love watching a lot of other teams and players as well.

Yeah? Like who?
Just to name a few, Dany Heatley, Vincent Lecavalier, Jarome Iginla, and while I don't see him as much as I'd like because he's in the Western Conference/not on a Candadian team, Scott Niedermayer.

You're a girl, you write for HLoG, and you're starting your own hockey blog. You're a puck bunny, aren't you?
Oh, yay, the one question I hate more than the Drury vs. Briere debate. Listen, I'm a red-blooded female and I'm not going to pretend I don't notice when a guy is good-looking. But I also understand what's going on the ice and appreciate the athletic ability and dedication required to play professional hockey. As a former athlete of decent talent, I'm in awe of the variety of skills necessary to play in the NHL. (Of course, it also helps that I don't really see the appeal of any of the Buffalo puck bunny favorites. Miller? No, sorry. Pominville? Eh. Totally average. Roy? Well, we're getting a little closer atleast. Henrik Tallinder and Paul Gaustad are the only Sabres I would consider above average, especially now that Jay and Marty are elsewhere.)

As for HLoG... If you've never checked it out, you should. You might be surprised.

Okay, you're not a puck bunny. But you MUST have an opinion on the Drury/Briere issue.
Okay, fine! Sign me up for Team Drury. Geez.

Home Sweet Home

The good about tonight's 5-2 victory over the Capitals:

- A victory at home after 3 losses in our building, one of them so ugly it brought the boo birds out. (I'm personally not a fan of booing your own team under any circumstances but to each his own, I guess.) We have a great chance of having home ice advantage throughout the entire playoffs so it'd be nice to play well there, you know?

- Two power play goals! Our power play has been very Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde this season - mostly Mr. Hyde - so it was nice to see some improvement. We were more or less keeping the puck in the zone, moving it around a little bit better, and actually putting some shots on goal. (Also on my list of things I hate are fans who yell, "SHOOOOOOOOOT!" through the entire power play but seriously guys, SHOOOOOOOOOOT!) Washington wasn't pressuring the PP units as much as some of the last few opponents have been so that probably helped but still... I think part of the problem has been a lack of confidence - guys are definitely gripping their sticks a little - so maybe a 50% night will ease some of the panic. Special teams in general were very solid tonight with the penalty kill shutting down the Caps powerplay.

- Drew Stafford getting two goals and playing like a man possessed. He had started to come down to earth some the last few games so it was nice to see his energy back up. I'm going to have to agree with Rick Jeanneret on this one: "He may never darken the doors of Rochester again." If any of the Rochester boys have earned the right to stay up and in the line-up, it's Stafford. His second goal was a beauty. We have to do something about the "Dreeeeeeew" chant though. That's Drury's thing. Stafford needs his own thing.

Side note: I love when a guy on the team with the lead has two goals and his teammates spend the last few minutes of the game making ridiculously stupid passes to him in an effort to get him a hat-trick. I can't think of a situation in any other professional sport where teammates go out of their way to give someone else on the team a little glory. Just one of the little things that makes hockey special.

- Le petit Briere scored his 30th goal tonight, making him the Sabres' fourth 30 goal scorer, Chris Drury (35), Thomas Vanek (35), and Jason Pominville (31) being the other three. If Maxim Afinogenov hadn't missed so much time with his hand injury, he would've been a lock for 30 as well. That means we have a 30 goal scorer on three different lines. Not too shabby.